Warm Fall Days

Today was a great day to look at pumpkins after church. 80 degree weather was a stark contrast to the winter coats we wore last year doing the same activity. Eli and Sidney had fun exploring the many different varieties of pumpkins. We wheeled 50 lbs. of pumpkins in our two wagons, and picked up our free popcorn. It sounds like a lot but actually was enough for some decorating and pumpkins for carving in a few weeks.

I was happy Sidney spotted the popcorn and asked to have some. Over the past few months, eating has been a bit challenging. We go through days when there is no issue with eating while other days are more difficult. I know this is a reality of her experience, but we struggle for Sidney to gain an understanding that food will always be around. She seeks comfort in the presence of food. We have watched her ask for food at bedtime. She takes a small bowl of crackers, sits in by her pillow in the corner of her pack n play, turns over and goes to sleep.

There are times when she is actually hungry, but there are many times when the food goes untouched. We are working with her to use her words to let us know when she is hungry. Any indication of hunger sets off an internal alarm, and we are hoping to help her avoid this panic. I also think she will not feel as afraid if she is able to tell us exactly what she needs. These issues have obviously toned down, however they continue to resurface. From what I can gather from other adoptive parents, this issue continues to a lesser degree, in phases. We went through a period when we thought this had resolved itself, but it resurfaced again. It helps that Tom and I can offer reassurance that she might not have understood even six months ago. 

There is one positive element of her experience with food in the orphanage, her ability to share. She learned to share whatever it is that she is playing with, eating, or whatever else she might pass on to another. To the extent that when she is eating, she will offer a fork full of food to the person sitting next to her.  This is one of the sweetest qualities about Sidney. This is definitely something we could all learn a lesson from. The only time I have seen her refuse to share is squabbling with her brother, but I am happy she is behaving like a normal sister.